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Monthly Archives

July 2015

Happy birthday my darling Lola

By | Personal

Happy Birthday My Darling Girl, 12 today! It seems so long since you were here its hard to imagine that you would now be 12 and looking forward to your 2nd year in High School.

I miss you every day and things are just not as good without you, no matter how much fun and laughter can fill a moment, it is never genuinely perfect without You! You have such a big influence on all out lives, Ava always mentions you in here literary at school, Lila-Bleu & Reya still send you up every balloon they can get their hands on, Daddy….. Well I see in his eyes every day how he misses you, his laugh, his smile is always just a little less full these days and me….. Well I still have to count out dinner plates, wash some of your clothes despite Lila-Bleu growing out of them, pray to God to keep you safe…Despite my indifference to Him for taking you in the first place!

Lola – My Darling Girl, My First born, My World….. I want you to know how much you are missed i miss your smile, your laugh, your love of  chocolate biscuits, pickled onion monster munch, Tonic Water & Cranberry Juice,the way you used to run everywhere, your kindness and  your courage.  There are not enough words to express all the things I’ve missed out on since you’ve been gone,it makes me sad to not know what school you would have chosen,  who is your best friend, what sports you like ….. this just goes on & on and I could spend hours thinking of all that I have missed out on but this really does not help.

I’m sorry I couldn’t save you, I’m sorry I didn’t have the knowledge to know what was wrong, I’m sorry I didn’t appreciate your perfectness and intelligence as much as I should have. If I could hold you just one more time, feel your cuddles hear your voice, I would give so much My Darling. I know we will be together again one day, so stay close with Ganpa, Nana and Granda and tell them that I love them. Be kind, be wise but most of all Know how much you are Loved and Be Happy…… And have a wonderful 12th Birthday Sweet Girl.
Love you Always and forever,
Mummy xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx